Hopes and Dreams – Rediscovering Memories and Shared Lives
My thoughts after reading Remembering Yesterday. Caring Today
8 sessions are not long enough for us to create memory books, boxes and do the work needed to get the group to gel, and become effective. We should concentrate on bonding the group and developing the creative bond, and sense of fun. Then we should try to get further funding for further work. I am suggesting that we don’t attempt the memory boxes, but stick with the memory books.
If we do it right, people will not want it so end, and a monthly re-union will be needed. This has been proved already by the reaction to the ending of the Art Therapy Courses.
If possible, we need to build in a continuity strategy, Pam suggests monthly reunion meetings, and in an ideal world, plan to get the group together again for stage 2 that could include memory boxes
We should build in some preparation work. One workshop for facilitators and volunteers, and at least one meeting with the carers in advance could be extremely helpful in a number of ways. Information about the individuals with dementia will help us to design the course to prompt their memories. For example, a man worked on the railways. We could make sure we have railway memorabilia, train sounds etc. In addition we can prepare the carers as to what would be helpful to bring to sessions, and give them space to vent in advance. (see 5.)
Pam explains that built up resentment in hard working carers can surface in sessions and interfere with the process. Carers need a space to let it out. They can be syphoned off during sessions to vent,, but given our time restriction a preliminary session for venting might be useful.
Carers need to be dis-encouraged to speak for their partners. We all need to be able to wait for those with dementia to speak. But, on the other hand, telling people with dementia stories that they used to tell themselves can be immensely satisfying for them, even if all they do is nod in remembrance. Carers will be crucial in knowing these stories. Encouraging them to recall those stories, perhaps asking other family members for stories to bring in can enrich the sessions.
The next pages consist of an outline of pre-session activities and session 1 itself taken from the book. I recognise some of the ideas from early sessions in the woods, but here the focus is more intense to encourage and stimulate memories.
Discussion Outline for Hopes and Dreams – Rediscovering Memories and Shared Lives
Pre session 1
Recruit group leaders and volunteers
Prep the project team
One workshop session
Recruit participants, organise preliminary visits, and organise transport if required
The home visit is to explain what will happen, give reassurance, find out a bit about the people who will be attending, and get some ideas of reminiscence triggers that might be brought from home, or referred to during the sessions.
Produce written material:
invitations to participants, including explanation of project, introduction to the project team, clearance form asking permission to use photos
timetable of the project for all participants
group agreements
Hopes and Fears and Hopes and Fears revisited forms
Session breakdowns, attendance record, session notes for facilitators
Session record for participants
Name lables
Gather together equipment and resources
Plan debriefing and monitoring
Set up monthly reunion sessions for after weekly sessions end
Outline Timetable for eight sessions
Introductions
Childhood and family life
Schooldays
Starting work and working lives
Going out and having fun
Weddings
Homes gardens and animals
Rounding up and evaluation
Session 1. Introductions
Objectives:
to make people feel welcome and relaxed
to introduce people to each other
to get started on reminiscence
to generate interest and enthusiasm
Outline plan
Triggers: (supplied by us)
Birth and marriage certificates, maps, name books
Set the room up so that people can work in small groups ( two couples and a facilitator or volunteer) but able to turn inwards for form an inclusive circle, with triggers on tables to encourage conversation as people arrive. Obviously the main space at the pair tree would be work for this session as it has small tables already, or could we borrow some small tables that are at good reading and writing height?
Arrival. (10 mins?) Team members greeting and seating, providing name labels, collecting hopes and fears forms, and encouraging conversation.
Warm up (10 mins?) When everyone has arrived the lead facilitator welcomes everyone and starts the warmup activity – Go round the circle, say your name and and one thing that you like. ( E.g. my name is May and I like dancing) Leader repeating and making connections where they exist between others in the group. Give couples a few moments to prepare with the help of facilitator/volunteer.
Small group activity explore names: (20 mins)
Names first middle and last
Where names came from, who chose them
Family history of names
Local, national or international associations
Nicknames
Names for different times and places, home, work, child, adult
How we feel about our names
If I could have chosen my name…
Anything else name related
People are encouraged to enter their names in to their memory books, perhaps with some of the information about the name that has come up in discussion (I added this one)
Whole Group activity: (15 mins)
Feed back to the whole group, what has emerged from these discussions
Invite everyone to get up and greet as many people as possible, saying their own name, and using different ways of saying hello (saluting, thumbs up, bowing, shaking hands, waving, hugging, hand slapping) Leader helps group to explore greetings and connections, such as salutes from service men, brownies, scouts and Guides, greetings associated with particular countries, old fashioned greetings like bows and curtsies, or hat tipping, forelock tugging…
Tea / loo break, (20 mins) served at small tables, same groups as before
Small group activity (20 mins)
Where did we grow up?
What was it like?
A city, a town a village?
A flat, a house a caravan?
Was it cold or warm? Tidy or a mess?
Whole Group Activity (15 mins)
Feed back to the group Leader asks anyone who can remember to share their childhood address
Leader suggests that the names and places where people grew up are recorded on a large piece of paper.
Ask people to think of a song that they associate with the places they have been remembering. Find a song that most people can sing together.
Closing (10 mins)
Leader gives summary of the session, each family is given a pack about the project to take home. The plan for the following week is explained and everyone is asked to bring one or two photographs of themselves as children, and /or two objects associated with their childhoods. Thanks for coming, and personal good-byes.
Session 2: Childhood and Family Life
Objectives:
To develop the sense of belonging to the group
To introduce creative activities related to memory
To re-experience the feel of childhood
To work co-operatively to recall the past
Outline Plan
Triggers
Family photos
Family bible
Sample family tree
Childhood games, skipping rope, conkers
Opening 10 mins
Welcome and thanks for coming. As the team greet people refer back to something they learned about them on week one (a nickname, where they are from, a song, or something they liked).
Seat at tables again, two couples to a table, perhaps placing people together based on common ground that emerged last week. Team give out name lables.
Warm-up 10 mins
At tables invite people to share photos or objects they have brought in. Have such things to hand in case they have forgotten.
Main Activities 1 small groups
Ask participants to remember a family member or neighbour who was important to them in their early years. Find out about them and draw a picture of them while talking about what they wore, their hair etc. 10.00 mins
Try to create a family tree for person with dementia, helped by carer 10.00 mins
As a whole group show and tell. Invite participants place their photos and objects at the ‘exhibition’ (large table)10 mins
Tea Break 20 mins
During tea break encourage participants to look at the ‘exhibition’
Main Activities 2 whole group
Arrange a display of childhood games. Invite group members to chose one to play with, demonstrate, talk about.
Allow the group to mix and play games with each other
Childhood songs
Closing
Leader summarises session, and announces the theme for next week. Invite people to bring in photos and memorabilia (reports, prizes) of school days, and school friends. Every one invited to retrieve their photos and objects for their books and boxes. Thanks for coming, and personal good-byes.
Session 3: School Days
Objectives:
To continue to develop the sense of belonging to the group
To introduce a new creative activity, improvisation
To re-experience the good and bad aspects of being at school
To build up a sense of common experience
To have separate time with carers
Outline Plan
Triggers
Slates, exercise books
Blackboard, chalk
School satchel. School tie and cap
Dipping pen and ink
A globe
Cane
Skipping rope
Opening:
Welcome each family and thank them for coming, show them to seats in rows as in a classroom, and tick their names off a register. As many props as possible to suggest a class room. Leader as teacher, quite fierce, says Good Morning children, reply good morning Sir/Miss.Teacher takes register, asking group to decide punishment for late comers. Throughout the session, the Teacher moves in and out of role to get responses then help act them out.
Warm-up
Teacher take suggestions for physical drill. Pass round a school satchel and invite everyone to mime putting something that they might have taken to school into it saying what it is, i.e. sandwich, a penny, a geometry set, homework, a cigarette, a catapult, a frog.
Main Activities Session 1
Teacher comes out of role, or another facilitator, asks If this is the classroom of your childhood, what can we see on the walls?, what furniture is there and how is it arranged? What is everyone wearing? Other facilitators can join in to stimulate.
Teacher in role asks participants to sing a hymn, (All Things Bright and Beautiful, We Plough the fields and Scatter, Onward Christian Soldiers. Ask participants if they have a favourite hymn or poem from school and encourage them to recite or sing.
Times tables recited together
Ask who won prizes at school and act out prize giving.
Announce break time and a chance to remember playground memories. Teacher asks to see some children in her office and calls out names of carers to go to another space.
Tea Break tea and snacks for both groups
Main Activities Session 2
Groups remain divided till Closing.
People with dementia and facilitators work in smaller groups to
play games connected with play time at school
explore memorabilia brought from home
draw pictures of a remembered teacher, best friend or themselves at school age
Carers
feed back on how the sessions are going so far,
learn more about the project
If carers tend to dominate and speak for their partners try some exercises to help them be more patient.
Closing
Leader gives a summary of what has been done, and thanks everyone for going back to school. Participants place photos, drawings and memorabilia in books and boxes. Leader explains next week’s theme: leaving school and starting work, and asks everyone to bring in photos and memorabilia associated with their working lives. Thanks for coming, and personal good-byes.
Session 4: Starting work and working lives
Objectives:
To appreciate past skills an achievements of members
To find shared memories and common ground among group members
To celebrate diversity and difference in members experience of work
To explore the humour in being young and inexperienced
Outline Plan
Triggers
tools
typewriter
wage packet
old money
apprenticeship certificates
aprons
washing boards
overalls
Opening 10 mins
Welcome and thanks for coming. Perhaps an improvised clocking in system
Warm-up 10 mins
Machine exercise, in a circle, one by one everyone begins to make an improvised repetitive movement with a sound till we make a big machine.
Main Activities 1
Guess My Line: in groups of twos or threes participants hear about each other’s jobs and create a small mime to show to the whole group
In a whole group the leader asks about the first pay packet. How much was it? What did we spend that first pay on? Answers to be recorded on a flip chart. To see who was paid the most and who the least, and relate it to the year.
Tea Break 20 mins
Prepare a traditional filled sandwiches wrapped in brown paper, and mugs of strong tea.
Main Activities 2
In small groups explore items and pictures brought from home.
Use these to draw a picture, make a chart, are a piece of writing for the people with dementia, about their working lives. ( a plan of the work place, a picture of the person wearing what they wore to work, a chart illustrating process, a story about the boss)
Using a selection of appropriate props and costumes each group prepares a scene or tableau about working based on the memories of one or more members of the group.
Present these to the whole group
Closing
Leader summarises session, and asks participants to name their favourite moments. Announce next weeks’s theme: Going out and having fun. Ask people about what they did, and what their favourite music was. and invite people to bring in photos of themselves dressed up to go out, favourite dance music CD’s.and if possible, one or two objects associated with recreational activities of their youth,
Session 5: Going Out and Having Fun
Objectives:
To recall past pleasures
To remember how it felt to be young, beautiful, and fit
To share common experiences: going to the cinema, a dance, first kiss
To key in to shared experiences in the group
Outline Plan
Triggers
Nylon stockings
Make up, Hair brushes, sprays, brillcream
Shaving strop and razor
Jewellery
Gloves and handbags
Gramophone records, Theatre programmes, Scrapbooks of film stars
Cycle parts, fishing gear
Opening 10 mins
Have music playing that was suggested by the group last week. Invite them to dance and dance them to a seat in a circle around the room. Have a display of items above in the centre of the room and ask participants to add things they have brought.
Prepare bags of objects for groups to explore, men and women.
Warm-up 10 mins
Mirror exercise. In pairs, participants mime and mirror, putting on make up, shaving, doing hair, putting on a tie.
Main Activities 1
In small groups recall courting experiences: chat up lines, flirting techniques, monkey parade, wolf whistles, wallflowers, getting in late, parental advice. This can also be done as a whole group, men on one side, women on the other.
Create or find space for dancing, play music suggested by participants, everyone dances
Arrange chairs in rows for a trip to the cinema. Play cinema music. Get participants to queue up to go in, buy tickets (using old money) show them to their seats with torch in hand.
Tea Break: serve ice cream, tea etc in their seats
Main Activities 2 whole group
Leader asks everyone what films they have come to see – call out favourite films
Leader names the film we are watching and participants react appropriately, a sound track would really help this, scary film, car chase, romantic film, funny film, sad film
Ask for memories of cinema trips
Closing
Leader summarises session, and announces the theme for next week: weddings. Invite people to bring in wedding photos and memorabilia: invitations, menus, flowers, bills, honeymoon memories
Every one invited to retrieve their photos and objects for their books and boxes. Thanks for coming, and personal good-byes.
Session 6: Weddings
Objectives:
To remind caring spouses of the foundation of their relationship
To reinforce bonds with people living or dead
To focus on participants at a glamorous time in their lives
To share common experience
Triggers
Marriage certificates
Wedding veil
Wedding rings
Wedding photos
Sample wedding presents
Love letters
Opening 10 mins
Have the room set up for a wedding: seats in rows with an aisle. Welcome participants as though to a wedding, asking/telling them if the are relatives of the bride or groom, and showing them to their seats, and encourage them to talk about the wedding that is about to start: what will the bride be wearing, how do we feel about the marriage etc.
Warm-up 10 mins
Mirror exercise again but with 2 people at the front, a man and a woman, taking turns miming preparation for the event. Everyone else mirrors the actions: women check their stockings, do their make up and hair, men shave, tie their tie polish their shoes etc.
Main Activities 1 small groups
Act out a wedding: two play the couple, everyone else play, best man, bridesmaids, vicar, brides parents, jilted boyfriend/girlfriend. Couple walk up the aisle to taped music or singing, and get married. Everyone has confetti to throw and encourage participants to give advice to the couple as they leave.
Pose for wedding photos.
In small groups explore items brought from home and choose 1 item from every one to be part of a Courting and Marriage display. Make captions for these items.
Bring the whole group together for creating this display. Take a photo of the display.
Tea Break 20 mins
Champagne and wedding cake? During Tea break record every participants weeding date and arrange them in order on a flip chart with their names and women’s maiden names.
Main Activities 2 whole group
Using displayed items the whole group makes up a story about an imaginary couple with evert one adding a sentence or one word. E,G. a team member might say And the bride was called, then asks a person with dementia to supply a name.
Make a wedding present list for an imaginary couple and/or explore memories of wedding presents received, wedding traditions they observed, the trousseau they collected, honeymoon plans, wedding night experiences(!)
Closing
Leader asks what people will remember from this session and announces the theme for next week: Homes gardens and animals, and Invites people to bring in photos and objects associated to a memorable where they have lived: the place, the garden and the animals, or anything else associated with that place.
Every one invited to retrieve their photos and objects for their books and boxes. Thanks for coming, and personal good-byes.
Session 7 Homes, gardens and animals
Objectives:
To stimulate memories of home environment in early married life
Recall activities and skills associated with home life, (DIY, gardening, decorating, sewing curtains, buying furniture, managing, money, looking after pets)
Triggers
Paint brush and paint
Garden tools
Rent books,
dog lead
hammer and nails
furniture catalogues
Opening 10 mins
Welcome and thanks for coming.
Warm-up 10 mins
In turns participants mime actions associated with home life, sweeping, hoovering, digging, painting walls, washing up, winding the baby, walking the dog, petting the cat etc. The rest of the group copy the actions. Carers can be syphoned off now
Main Activities 1
in small groups explore what people have brought from home. Encourage and talk over memories of places
go into the garden and explore memories of gardens, and other outdoor experiences: picking crops, shelling peas, hulling strawberries, hanging out the washing, animals kept (chickens guinea pigs, rabbits, etc.)
back inside, still in small groups, explore indoor activities and home projects: decorating, home improvements, buying furniture hire purchase, making clothes,
share with the whole group, paying particular attention to the memories of those with dementia
mime some of the activities for the whole group to guess.
Tea Break 20 mins
Try to serve tea in old china, retro cups or enamel mugs
Main Activities 2
in small groups explore memories of animals, and encourage participants to choose one to bring to the show.
animal show. Every one brings a remembered animal to the show and tells the group about them.
Remembered songs about animals for a group singsong.
Closing
Leader invites younger people in the room to comment on what they have learned from older peoples memories. Remind family carers that next week they should prepare and bring their appreciation of , or a summary of their shared life with, their caree. Hand out evaluation forms
Every one invited to retrieve their photos and objects for their books and boxes. Thanks for coming, and personal good-byes.
Session 8 Celebration and Evaluation
Objectives:
To give carers the opportunity to draw together what has been explored throughout the project concerning their persons life and character and the same for the person with dementia
To encourage carers to think positively about their person and to affirm their relationship.
To allow carers to put the present situation in the context of the life of the person with dementia and their relationship over time.
To hear from the group whay the sessions have meant to them
To affirm the group and its achievments
Triggers
Carers testimony
Records of the project: photos, written work, drawings, film etc.
Opening 10 mins
Welcome and thanks for coming.
Warm-up 10 mins
In a circle everyone turns to their neighbours and says how they will remember them and how their presence in the group has made a difference. Massage in a circle.
Main Activities 1
Invite families to show their appreciation of the person, along with photos and objects.
As each person is appreciated the group is encouraged to add their own appreciation, and remember stries shared and activities done together
Leader tells the story of the group, reminding everyone of the things they have done
.Photo’s of the sessions are passed around, video shown and commented upon.
In small groups participants share their evaluation forms and one person is nominated to feed back to the whole group.
Leader hands out certificates of participation, formally presented and applause
Tea Party: special tea and cakes
Closing
How many ways are there to say good-bye? Follow the leader initially but allow participants to thi k of a new one.
Leader makes formal thanks to all for their participation and commitment, and announces a re-union meeting. Personal warm good bye to all and everyone.
Kalikellett 