Yuka

Sitting under my washing drying from the raising heat of the fire, Yuka reminded me of her family story as she reflected on a cross roads of her life. Maybe fore the first time I know her exact age too, 56; she is over 10 yeas younger than I at 68.

I knew more about her father, an archer a well known martial arts archery instructor, who i’d met once, here at East Lodge he cam visiting, with Yuka’s sister, and neither of which I recall spoke English, which was a shock to me, Yuka being so international. ‘My sister and I were both given the same opportunities, she was sent to Australia and I to England, but we chose different paths, and she stayed in Japan, living with my father. What about your mother I asked?

She was a very intelligent person, but had not opportunity of further education, it was that time, she was that generation. She sewed, and of course, bought us up. ‘She died young, at 68, breast cancer. ‘I regret not knowing her for longer, She must have just died when I met you’

We measure this time by the life of Kali the dog, who I had just got, and who died last year aged 16, so we reckon I have known Yuka 15 years. She was based that time in Kirkesthan, but was over in Suffolk visiting her Mary.

I wonder at Yuka’s comment, we had the same opportunity. Although both were sent to foreign lands for their education, Yuka was given Mary. I cannot remember exactly how Yuka’s Japanses family knew Mary, a teacher and home educator, based at the time I think down in Kent, but to Mary Yuka came at the age of 15, and with Mary Yuka came up to Suffolk when Mary did, and in Suffolk I met Yuka. It was at a garden party of Pippa Dorling. I’d met Pippa randomly outside Focus Organic. Then actively run by Juan, he was the great connector and magnet to the creative, and Pippa was not the only person I met there who would lead me to a fruitful path. We must have found an attraction for we stayed in touch. I had just moved to Halesworth, had time on my hands to dally at Focus, (ah those time on my hands days). She lived in a cottage Middleton way, and it was summer we were gathered outside in the sunshine, Pippa’s artistic and unusual friends. Mary was amongst them. Mary and Pippa went back to their university days, both had gone to Oxford or Cambridge, part of the first women generation to break into the male dominion. Classics I think they both studied. Where is Pippa now I wonder? She’d moved away to be near her pottering family. She’d had a wayward son who’d gone to South Africa, and another who’d set up a pottery business. Anyhow, there we were, at this moment in time. I met Yuka in the kitchen, and was intrigued by her international life, her way, her practicality of helping, her story. The detail now forgotten. She invited m to her home in Westall, a few miles up the road, where she lived most modesty and artistically in an attached workers cottage near the medieval church.

That was over 15 years ago. She is a faithful friend. Most recently she came for the Big Conversation on immigration and was a star of the show, others as hungry as I was for direct experience, and such clarity of information.

The shift she explored with me under the drying washing was when to leave the UN. She’d been there after studying International Development at Leister University, so for 30+ years but some of them off their books, so 28 pension years. Should she stay 2 more for a fuller pension was the question. She’d been uncomfortable for the last 2 years, since leaving Turkey, based in HQ Geneva (Strategy), with a Dutchess boss and various other challenging staff. Various things conspired. Not only the Dutchess and other work frustrations, but Trump dismantalling the UN by withdrawing funding creating deep unsettlement. The death of two cornerstones of her life, her father and Mary, both last year.

We are linked by dogs. Yuka loves dogs. She is also an accomplised horse rider, and talented potter. We drink tea out of her beautifully turned cups.